Crotch-Grabbing Hedge Fund Wife Really Loves Her Pet Pig

Lisa Maria Falcone is the totally wacky wife of hedge fund billionaire Philip Falcone. She was sued for grabbing her gay servant's penis and housing him with her pet pig. She still really loves her pig.

Lisa Falcone grew up in Spanish Harlem, started modeling then got married to Philip Falcone, who later made a lot of money with his hedge fund, then made even more money betting against the subprime mortgage market. When we last left Lisa Falcone, she was defending herself against a highly amusing lawsuit filed by the family's former butler. He claimed she reached into his pants and grabbed his penis, and also told him that he needed a "good fuck to turn him straight." And also, most amusingly, she put him in an office which used to be the home of Wilbur, her piano-playing pet pig. While the butler is long gone, the pig remains an important part of Falcone's life. From W magazine:

On a snowy day in February, Lisa Maria, whose olive green cargo pants and cardigan are neatly color coordinated with a hefty heart-shaped emerald ring, is nuzzling her pet pig, Wilbur, while a cat purrs in the corner and a veritable flock of tiny dogs yaps away behind a baby gate. "I just love animals, I can't help it!" she shouts over the delighted squeals of the pig, who is being fed a carrot by the cook. Wilbur, Falcone says, can play the piano and will perform spins if prompted with a Cheerio.

The general gist of the W profile is that even though Falcone has billions of dollars she is not your typical high society woman. Much has been made about the time she interrupted a charity event and donated $10 million to the High Line. So nouveau riche! But that's just the beginning! She also;

  • "has been known to play soccer with her daughters in Central Park decked out in a Lanvin dress and an opera-length strand of South Sea pearls."

  • sleeps with her husband on an air mattress so that her twin daughters can sleep in their bed

  • Had an elaborate party for her daughters at the height of the financial crisis in which she "created an Oz like setting with little people and pink hay"

  • Is a vegetarian who wears leather because " "because it could be killed for meat. Therefore, I'm being an environmentalist."

  • OK, that last item was very old and maybe it's not true anymore. It is actually completely unnecessary to delve into the archives for funny things that Falcone said—things like "I'm still comfortable with the basic things" because she still is a quote-generating machine in the W article.

    Getting philosophical at the end of the profile, she says:

    "God's been good to us," she admits, with a glance around her plush cream-colored sitting room. "But you can't take it with you. He's loaned us a lot of props."

    Like a pet pig!