We'll Reform Wall Street Right After Everything Else Is Fixed

The Way We Live Now: Minding our reforms. We are reform-minded! Populists, embrace us. We are here to rein in those Wall Street bastards. Just as soon as we handle the collapse of real estate, college, child care, and roads.

It's true; despite what you poors may have heard from various wild-eyed propagandists, we, the wealthy few, are standing shoulder to shoulder with you in your quest to regulate Wall Street's excesses. It's just that—let's not get too hasty. Look first in thine own back yards, Main Street, before you come gunning for our street.

For example, the job market for new college grads is still craptastic. Maybe get that under control, hmm? And real estate, Jesus. Bastards with dirt cheap rent-controlled apartments are still lurking in your neighborhoods, and meanwhile, you can search the whole wide world and not find a good real estate investment. Not to mention the fact that there's no paint for the roads, there's nobody to take care of poor people's kids, and all they have left in Britain are budget cuts and airline strikes.

So, you might reasonably say that Wall Street is the least of your problems, regular folks. Just tend to the madness around you and let us worry about the crazy "financial instruments." We'll attack when the time is right.

[Pic via]