This week we bit another piece out of the Apple. Or was it the AT&T? Whatever it was, it was a bite of something.
Other big things happened this week. Some idiots at a gay gossip site flew an airplane over Rush Limbaugh's wedding, dropping cigars and candy and spreading a message of hope. Speaking of hope! Was Rush Limbaugh's favorite president Barack Obama in the "Whoomp! (There It Is)" video? Yes, he probably was. And his staff was so excited and tickled by this that they went out and got in a water gun fight. Do you want to be more like hep cat Barack Obama? Well then, move into his old apartment. You'll get all changey by osmosis!
Remember when lesbians were lesbians, before any of this faux lady kissing stuff? Those were the days, huh? Now all we have is nerd party kerfuffles and boring Kaballah sex scandals. Bah. At least we have those sexy American Apparel employees, who really need to be sexy as, like, a job requirement. At least there's that. Oh, and we have tits on a stick! Maybe things aren't so bad after all.
That's it! Have fun on your iPads this weekend.