Will Perez Hilton Go to Jail for Tweeting a Picture of Miley Cyrus' Vagina?

Perez finally crossed the line into child porn, and lawyers say his fate is grim. Lady Gaga throws a tantrum. Charlie Sheen drops another fancy car down a ditch. Tuesday gossip could go to jail for photoshopping a vagina.

  • Last night was full of BIG BREAKING NEWS: Perez Hilton tweeted a Miley Cyrus upskirt picture, and it showed a vagina. The image has since been scrubbed from the internet because Miley is seventeen, which means the image is child pornography. Salon interviewed a child porn defense attorney who said tweeting Miley's cooch was "suicidal for [Perez]," and "we're not talking about a misdemeanor." Perez's intent doesn't matter, nor does the veracity of the image. Photoshopping vaginas onto children is illegal, too: "Under the law, that is still a crime and it is punishable just the same. If you were to take the face of an 8-year-old and put that picture on the nude body of even an identifiable, fully-developed adult porn star, it is child porn punishable identical to if you took a photo of the actual child." How messed up is humanity that we even have laws for this? Though it apparently doesn't matter, I suspect the image was photoshopped, because censored versions show it's from this video shoot, and in every other photograph she appears to have panties on. (And even if the picture was of "form-fitting panties," Perez could still be prosecuted.) IN CONCLUSION: Perez Hilton could go to jail for cut-and-pasting a picture of a vagina. [Salon, CBS, Earsucker, DailyMail, image via Getty]

  • One of the Tiger mistresses has upgraded herself to Tiger baby mama. Porn star and escort Devon James says she had Tiger's baby in 2001, before he married Elin. [Deadspin, Radar]

  • Lady Gaga is serious about this new "beleaguered diva behaving badly" persona. (Unless it's really her? She's created a performative vortex where we're never allowed to judge her. If politicians learn this trick, we're doomed.) She swept into a Asia de Cuba, a hotel restaurant in Manhattan, wearing "a see-through gown and nude veil," and when someone "slyly took her picture," she "became noticeably upset, pushed her security team out of the way to confront the shutterbug and demanded he delete the photo." He did, though he shouldn't have: The only thing worth more than an original Gaga picture is an original Gaga-flicked-me-off story. [P6]

  • The lady accused of hitting Jackass star Bam Margera over the head with a baseball bad says she didn't do it, but if she did, it because he called her the n-word: "I'm innocent, and he's a jackass just like his movies. He called me the n-word. He uses racial slurs, uses the n-word with black in front of it." She should license the phrase "he's a jackass just like his movies" before Bam's managers start using it. [Popeater, PhilDailyNews]

  • Charlie Sheen's car was found ditched in a ravine for the second time in five months. Quit driving your car down ravines, Charlie! Alternately: Lock your garage door better. [Radar]

  • Heidi Montag's pantomimed-for-the-paparazzi soap operas have paid off: She and new BFF Jennifer Bunney are sealing the deal on a British TV show which will begin taping in September. As for the footage Heidi and Bunney shot in their Malibu Beach House, "the idea has been scrapped for now because of Spencer and Heidi's marital issues." They are really committing to that story line—is the British TV show a plot fabrication fo the Malibu show, too? Or the other way around? When did our pop stars become so post-modern? [X17Online]

  • In other Heidi news, Spencer thinks she's cheating with his ex-best-friend, ex-Marine and ex-bodyguard Cougar Zank. Heidi thinks Spencer is cheating, etc. [HollywoodLife]

  • In 2006, Gary Coleman signed documents requesting loved ones not to pull the plug on him if he was ever in a situation like the one where ex-wife Shannon Price pulled the plug on him a couple weeks ago. [TMZ]

  • Paris Hilton's new boyfriend is self-made nightclub mogul Cy Waits. He wears nice suits and is probably awful. [TMZ]

  • A Michael Jackson "dance karaoke" game for Wii and Xbox (outfitted with Microsoft's new Kinect motion sensor gaming technology) is tentatively scheduled for Christmas release. [TMZ]