Now that home sales are plunging again and prices are set to plummet, it's time to take advantage of the opportunity to buy yourself a brand new home somewhere terrible. Which of these hellacious real estate nightmares do you prefer?
1. A Huge Fucking Condo Complex in Williamsburg: The "New Domino" is a mind-bogglingly huge brand new condo tower complex that will be dropped on the edge of FoHo Williamsburg like an invading spaceship. Watch with amusement as incoming yuppies and "lived in the Burg for two years already" indie musicians gaze upon each other with mutual distrust, as elderly Italians despise them both. Bonus: before you move in, your neighbors already hate you. Good luck with that L train!
2. A "Pricey Vacation-Home Development in Florida's Walt Disney World": It used to be that you could only have a terrible time trudging the sweltering pavement at Walt Disney World for a week or so at most before your money ran out. Now, you can be stuck there forever. Not only will you pay up to $8 million for a new McMansion in one of America's shittiest housing markets; you'll also be agreeing to let everything from your builder to your architectural style be chosen by the Disney Corporation, well known arbiters of good taste. Did you know that Orlando is not even on a beach? It's actually landlocked, humid, and mosquito-infested. (More so than the rest of the state).
Or there's always under the bridge!