We know many of you don't have speakers (or headphones) at work, but you need to see the new promo for Jersey Shore. The version with sound's below, but we also have a silent interpretation for the rest of you.

For those of you who can watch and listen, feel free. For those of you who can't, this is what we learned from watching the clip while it played on mute.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

This winter it was very snowy in New York.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Vinny explains that snow is the guidos' enemy, because it ruins their poofs and makes their tans splotchy.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Sammi says there's only one white powder she likes, and it has nothing to do with the Coke commercial at the bottom of the screen.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

But because the house in Seaside Heights is all closed up for the winter...

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

...the crew goes to Miami.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

In Miami, they start drinking.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

And drinking.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Sammi and Ronnie are reunited.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Snooki dresses up as Lady Gaga for a costume party. JWOWW grabs her boobs.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

But then Snooki hates her Gaga outfit, because The Situation really wants to go as Gaga so she goes as Speedy Gonzalez instead.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Oh shit, Trash Bags is back. And she has real luggage!

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

The Situation sees her ass and says, "Wow!"

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

He calls his boys to talk about Trash Bags' ass. Damn, no duck phone.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Snooki still does not know how to operate a phone, duck or otherwise.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Nor does she know how to operate a table.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Uh oh! Hot tub time! You know what that means.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Ugly broads.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

DJ Paulie Disgrace hooks up with Natasha Lyonne!

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Vinny tries to lure someone into his bed. How does he do it?

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

He tells them he has a big dick. When Snooki heard, she had to get with him.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

"Ewww! Vinny! I told you not to get it in my mouth!"

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

"Ewww! I can still taste it. I need a pickle."

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Oh snap! Trash Bags versus Snooki rumble!

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Ronnie has a threeway with two strippers.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

In a moment of weakness, he tells Sammi about it.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

She throws him out of the bed.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

He goes back to the strippers.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Oh no. JWOWW has her fighting face on.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Shit, she's coming for Sammi.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Poor Sammi. Is she too stupid to know it's better not to step to JWOWW?!

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Now The Situation and Trash Bags are going at it.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

The DJ Paulie Doll Blow Up Doll.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

The JWOWW Blow Up Doll.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Snooki brings home the world's tallest greyhound. We bet she's saying something about her vagina.

Let's Watch The New Jersey Shore Promo with the Sound OffS

Damn, we can't fucking wait!