The man who gets into one-sided fights with the Internet or words like "social justice" declared his upcoming Restoring Honor rally open to Black Panthers because the patriot-fest is about building character, not laying claim to MLK's legacy.

Beck spent the episode justifying FBI infiltration of the Black Panthers for being bigger racists than Mel Gibson, thus his modest trepidation is understandable. But the more concerning issue was the mention of a chat he had with his father over the weekend wherein his father acted primarily as Glenn's psychiatrist. This led Glenn to the unsurprising conclusion that he has made a colossal, if not inordinate, amount of enemies. This alone would be enough, but Beck also ended two segments pleading for tips and decrying the size of his staff.

Despite what seems to be an impending implosion, Beck delivered promises to get into a new fight with words like "collective salvation" for the entire episode tomorrow. Perhaps his greatest fear comes from making sweeping generalizations about religion that he cannot back up. After he decided that "Obama hates white people," he lost most of his sponsors. Perhaps Beck is ready to start censoring himself; perhaps he has realized getting into a fight with religion could be worse for him than sweeping generalizations about racism.

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And yet, all this guilt seems to point to a more logical conclusion: come tomorrow night, Beck is going to announce that he is now—and has always been—a Mulatto-American with deeply seeded far-left leanings. His television and radio shows have been a gargantuan hoax crafted in order to garner support for Tea Parties nationwide, proving America to be the ultimate sulking hypocrite and racist.

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