Planes, trains, and automobiles? If only! Planes are for the rich. So are automobiles. We're left with trains. Which are getting more expensive, less punctual, and more annoying.

Here's what's coming up next year, NYC subway riders: weekly and monthly passes with higher fares and a limit on rides! The pay-per-ride bonus cut in half! No more one-day passes! A surcharge on new farecards! And two years with no raises for all MTA workers!

Maybe you'll just boycott the subways then, eh? The NYC metro area has many other fine trains you can take. How about New Jersey Transit? Oh sure, if you like riding THE LATEST TRAINS OF ALL. Or maybe you'll stick to the Long Island Railroad? Sure, it you like riding with HORDES OF CASHLESS TWENTYSOMETHINGS who only carry debit cards and then they get on the train and the conductor's like "cash only please" and they're like "Durr, I never carry cash, I only carry debit cards dude, whatever" and cause a big scene and give everyone a freakin headache.

What are you gonna do, ride a bike? Pick your poison.

[Pic: Seth W.]