Burn Your Credit Cards NowS

The Way We Live Now: paying later. Down the road our situation will more favorably facilitate the repayment of loans taken on credit that we cannot currently afford. We have faith! Faith is American! We won't be broke—later!

Here's a little secret for all the "poors" out there that "the man" doesn't want you to know: credit cards are never good. Ever! Ever ever ever! There is never a situation in which it is "good" for your long term financial health, as a poor person, to use a credit card for something you do not have the money to pay for. Not even if you get credit card "rewards," which benefit the wealthy at the expense of the poor, because while the wealthy can just go ahead and buy that "reward" toaster, the poor will continue running up charges on their credit card in order to reach that "reward," finally having paid a dear price to achieve this relatively worthless bauble.

I mean sure, sometimes you have to use the credit card cause you're broke and you have to survive. But you'll pay for that shit. Oh, you'll pay for it.

Which is not to be negative! Many of our finest corporations depend on sucking the lifeblood of the poor through various credit schemes, so take heart in the fact that you are supplying the lifeblood of the American shareholder: poor people's hard-earned cash! The people who ultimately profit from the proliferation of easy, enslaving credit could be anyone—a highly paid director of a nonprofit group that helps the poor, for example, which would be funny and ironic. Or maybe it's the brawny man who comes and evicts you and forces you to move somewhere else, which has been happening a lot lately. Or perhaps it's just the average everyday economist with a few mutual funds, who spends the rest of his time productively pointing out that that stimulus money sure was nice, while it lasted.

What we do know is who will not be making more money off poor people feverishly using credit cards: poor people. So for the sake of economic safety, if you are poor, follow these simple guidelines before buying something fancy "on the card:"

1. Burn your credit cards.

We see brighter days ahead.

[Pic via]