Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big Day

Snooki avoids spending the night in jail. Levi Johnston's ex-girlfriend denies he knocked her up. Casey Affleck has more trouble on his hands. Oh, and there's a big wedding happening today. It's time for a delayed installment of Saturday gossip.

  • Snooki is a free woman and has returned to frolicking on the beaches of New Jersey today, thank God. After she was arrested yesterday afternoon for disorderly conduct, she was taken to "police headquarters" in guido paradise Seaside Heights and released a little while later with a summons. (Although JWOWW had generously promised to bail Snooki out, it turns out that wasn't necessary.) If you see Snooki oiled up on the beach today, buy her a congratulatory cocktail or two. [Radar Online, Us]

  • Did you hear that Chelsea Clinton is getting married? It's true! And the wedding takes place later today! Want more info on the nuptials, like what brand of cocktail napkin she decided to go with, or what eyeliner she'll be wearing for the big event? See here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.

  • Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big DayA few days ago, the National Enquirer reported that Levi Johnston has been cavorting with his his ex-girlfriend, Lanesia Garcia, and recently got her pregnant. And yesterday, it came out that fiancee Bristol Palin was so infuriated by the news, she was only communicating with Levi by text message. Garcia now says that Levi isn't the father and she has no idea how that rumor started: "We haven't hung out at all since 8th or 9th grade when we broke up." Will Bristol believe her? Will the Levi-Bristol marriage take place as planned? Find out in the next installment of the Wasilla Hillbillies. [Us]

  • A second woman has come forward accusing Casey Affleck of sexually harassing her, claiming Affleck "climbed into bed with her and groped her as she slept." Like the other woman who came forward last week, Affleck's latest accuser also worked on the Joaquin Phoenix documentary he's making. [THR]

  • Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big DayMel Gibson's ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva has responded to Gibson's accusation that she tried to extort him by threatening to release those audio recordings of Gibson going crazy. "I think Mel is basically trivializing domestic violence, and this is very, very sad." One other way to trivialize it? Use the scandal to try and jump start your TV career. [TMZ, NYDN, Radar Online]
  • Jamie-Lynn Sigler and her boyfriend of three months, NFL quarterback Mark Sanchez, have parted ways. This is because Sanchez is 23 and "wants to play the field," whereas Meadow Soprano is all grown up (she's 29 already?!) and "is looking for a more mature and stable relationship." Until that happens, she can always count on Turtle from Entourage for late-night booty calls. [Page Six, L&S]

  • Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big DayOne of Hollywood's most beautiful marriages is about to come to an end. Yesterday Heidi Montag officially filed for divorce from Spencer Pratt. (They legally separated two months ago, as you may recall.) Both are now single and reportedly looking to move on with their lives. So get to it, people. These two are hurting and could use some companionship. [Popeater]

  • Poor Bobby Brown. Although he appeared on Celebrity Fit Club, he's turned fat again: "Whitney Houston's ex looked chubby while hauling four Loehmann's bags into a black Mercedes SUV last week. A witness said his belly was hanging out of a gray T-shirt while he filled up his car outside a shopping center in DC." Wait, he's still driving a Mercedes? [Page Six]

  • Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big DayCharlie Sheen will appear in court in Aspen on Monday for another hearing on charges he assaulted his estranged wife Brooke Mueller last Christmas. It will also mark his 5,000th lifetime courtroom appearance, for which he'll receive a commemorative gold gavel and plaque from the National District Attorneys Association. [Radar Online]

  • Susan Sarandon is speaking out against child sex trafficking. She has no problem with grown-ups getting it on with youngsters, mind you. She just insists they be over the age of 18 and it be consensual. [Speakeasy]

  • He'll soon go on trial for his role in the death of Michael Jackson, but what's Dr. Conrad Murray up to in the meantime? He's chilling with babes in South Beach, apparently. [Bauer-Griffin]

  • Chelsea Clinton isn't the only famous person getting married this weekend. Rapper T.I. just tied the knot with his girlfriend of nine years, Tameka "Tiny" Cottle, in a "secret" ceremony in Miami. Mazel tov! [TMZ]

  • Snooki Goes Free as Chelsea Gets Ready for Her Big DayReal Housewife of New Jersey Teresa Giudice has had some financial difficulties as of late, as you may have heard. But she's bouncing back, don't you worry. She's been hired to appear in commercials for her favorite local tanning salon, Sizzle Tans ("which has branches in Totowa, East Hanover and Parsippany," if you're interested). The classy commercial is below for your viewing pleasure. [Popeater, People]

[Photo of Snooki and JWOWW in Miami earlier this year via Bauer-Griffin]