Page Six reports folk hero Steven Slater attended a Playgirl honcho's bacchanalia this weekend. One problem: The guy in their picture isn't Steven Slater, who spent his weekend listening to Barry Manilow in Atlantic City. How to tell them apart.
Chubby blond men with receding hairlines and ruddy faces, this is your moment. Yours is a humble physicality, one that doesn't usually make velvet ropes pull back or panties drop. But we're pretty sure one chubster used his forgettably average looks to become the life of a fancy party on Sunday, by telling everyone he was famed flight attendant Steven Slater.
Page Six reports:
Steven Slater didn't seem worried about the law on Sunday as he partied with 350 other gay men on a birthday cruise for Playgirl VP of marketing Daniel Nardicio. Slater […] enjoyed bottles of Budweiser and shouted, "Fly United!"
People never look carefully at men with Steven Slater's body type (we save our ogling for svelte hotties) so if you are one, it's easy to pretend you are someone else. For instance, Page Six's photo editors probably noticed Fake Steven Slater's wide, square chin and heavy jowls—but failed to notice that he lacks the real Steven Slater's trademark chin dimple.
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Other discrepancies: Fake Steven Slater isn't blond enough. His forehead is too small. His sideburns are too long. (Real Steven Slater's were short on Saturday when he met Barry Manilow, so there's no way he grew them that fast.) And he drinks Budweiser, when we all know that Blue Moon is the real Steven Slater's beer of choice.
Since the real Steven Slater essentially became a hero for stealing beer from his employer in a really dramatic way, we're inclined to consider Fake Steven Slater a minor hero for stealing beer from Daniel Nardicio and getting a dramatic write-up in gossip bible Page Six. If Fake Steven Slater would like to drop me a line, I have a few ideas for which parties he should crash next. The possibilities are endless when you have your own, personal Steven Slater handy. [P6]
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