HBO Looking to Get Into PornS

Well, more porn. And they need Mark Wahlberg's help. Also today: Glee gets totally rejected for once, Idris Elba has a scary new part, USA loves to renew its shows, and an important film is a success.

Ugly, not-at-all-suave oaf Idris Elba, from that awful show The Wire, has replaced Morgan Freeman as Alex Cross, the detective from James Patterson's wildly successful mystery novel series. Freeman played the sleuth in Kiss the Girls, about evil Carey Elwes (1997 spoiler alert), and Along Came a Spider, about a mysterious murder on the set of the Jeff Daniels film Arachnophobia. But Freeman is an older fellow now, so ere we'll see Elba. They're hoping this will be a franchise, obviously, though the first one is about Cross "track[ing] a serial rapist who may have murdered his pregnant wife years before", which sounds a little bleak for a series. But who knows! Se7en 2: It's Fourteen Now might still get made. Could happen! [Deadline]

This sounds somewhat intriguing. HBO is developing a show about the porn industry in California, following a video company struggling to stay afloat in this internet age as seen through the eyes of new actress on the scene. Mark Wahlberg is executive producing, which, whatever. He did good things for porn in Boogie Nights and good (but also bad) things for HBO with Entourage. James Frey is writing the pilot for the show, which he hopes will be "a sprawling epic about the porn business in LA". Heh, sprawling. This show could really go any way. It could be sleazy and lowbrow. It could be serious and a little sad. Or it could be some probably perfect mix of all of that. What we can be near 100% sure of is that Katie Morgan will make a cameo. Man does that lady like making cameos in things. [THR]

Noomi Rapace, who plays Elizabeth Salamander in the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo movies that won't exist once the real ones come out, might be embarking on a bit of a Marion Cotillardian career adventure. Casting directors and producers have taken an avid interest in the 31-year-old Swede, and she's flown out to LA for bigtime meetings, including for Sherlock Holmes 2 and Mission: Impossible 4. Nice! Those two movies are bound to be... movies. American movies. That's what really matters. Sure someone can spend their whole miserable sun-starved life shivering in the snowfields making movies out of birch tree bark, but true movie making begins when one sets their strange Scandinavian elf feet on American shores and gets in with the rock 'em sock 'em big boys. Look at Cotillard! Hasn't made a French movie since the Oscar and doesn't have one in the works. That's how you do it, Noomi. Kiss Stockslo or wherever you live goodbye. Welcome to Realtown, Population: you. [Deadline]

Haha. Area good band Kings of Leon got a phone call from Glee that was like "Hiiiii! Can we use your song in our super-special show???" and then the Kings said "NO!!" Kings of Leon said hoof to that show. They threw a rock 'n roll slurpee in that smug little program's scrub-cheeked, snarky face. Damn the man, save the Empire! You go on with your bad selves, Kings of Leon. Kings of Leon who have had three songs appear on Gossip Girl! Zingbots! You keep your principles in-motherfucking-tact, man! Never sell out, unless it's a thwarted attempt to get into Blake Lively's golden underpants. If then, then yeah, do whatever it takes, seriously. [EW]

Oh good. It's nice to know in these troublesome times that people can still take a break and go have a few laughs. Just some real good deep belly laughs. Laughs for things that are funny. Like Vampires Suck, a vampire parody movie that's one of these modern-day mutant offspring of the Zucker brothers. (Who admittedly have become mutants of themselves in latter years.) Vampires Suck, which makes fun of the mostly unassailable Twilight francheez, won the box office yesterday, raking in some $4M. WEDNESDAY WIN. Of course it has the formidable Lottery Ticket and Nanny McPhee Returns to contend with this weekend, but with all its 2008-referencing vampyr humor power, it ought to do just fine. But obviously Nancy McPhee will take the top spot. Thus paving the way for the gay porn parody (speaking of parodies!), Nancy McPhee, about a snaggle-toothed, be-moled nanny at a home for wayward twinks. Oddly, Emma Thompson will star. [Variety]

Oh goody. Those of you who work down at the offices of Career Transitions for Piper Perabos need not worry today. You won't have to do any work for a while. Her USA show — Crimes and Wacky Quips, Lit Poorly, and Only Acted Decently (also known as Covert Affairs) — has been picked up for a Season 2. That means more blind Christopher Gorham. More Anne Dudek wishing she was back on Mad Men or Big Love or even House. And, most importantly, more of Peter Gallagher's eyebrows slowly threatening to consume the world. (Disclosure: I have never watched this show so I don't really know what it's about or if Peter Gallagher or his eyebrows are still on it. And, it's important to note, Peter Gallagher's eyebrows are my dad.) [Deadline]

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