Today celebrities are awful because of awards gifting suites. You know, where millionaires are given extravagant amounts of fancy free shit because they're famous. Well the Emmys are on Sunday and this year the suites are all about charity.
Gifting suites, a swanky tradition around Hollywood awards shows, are increasingly emphasizing their charitable tie-ins as a way to bring in celebrities who might find it crass to attend an event that resembles trick-or-treating for (already wealthy) adults. Especially because the country's still mired in the effects of the recession, the focus on donating to worthy causes allows image-conscious stars to haul home some high-end loot without looking completely out of touch.
"Having a strong link to a charity means that the event's not just about taking, it's also about giving back," said Gavin Keilly, founder and chief executive of GBK, a veteran event producer whose Emmy lounge at the SLS Hotel in Beverly Hills will benefit CancerCare and other nonprofit groups. "It gives the celebrities a chance to learn about these charities, and it gives us a better chance of having them show up."
Ha ha ha. Oh, celebrities. You're awful. I'm glad everyone feels better about all their free trips and jewels and things because of the charities. Now it's not garish at all! Now it's just regular people in regular gowns receiving regular gifts for regular no-reasons.
People who run gifting suites are also awful. Everyone's awful. I'm awful. You're awful. But celebrities are the awfulest.