Pope Having Trouble Selling Tickets, Despite Special Rap SongS

Pope Benedict XVI is having trouble giving away tickets to the events he's presiding over during his visit to Britain. Even though he has a special rap track for the occasion!

According to The Independent, Catholic organizers are scrambling to give away the 400,000 tickets that have been allocated for open-air masses in Glasgow, London and Birmingham. Why? According to Catholic officials, it's "administration problems," of course!

Yes, it must be administrative problems, and not, say, that the events cost between five and 25 pounds to attend. After all, those aren't entrance fees! No, no, according to Peter Jennings, spokesman for the Archdiocese of Birmingham, they're "contributions." See, attendees are "not paying to go to mass, which is free–-the £25 contribution is for the cost of travel and the travel arrangements." Jeez, why isn't anyone going to this free mass?

And it certainly has nothing to do with the fact that Benedict was one of several clerics involved in a massive institutional coverup of childhood sex abuse. No, it's definitely "administration problems."

The real tragedy? The Pope had his own personal rap theme for this visit! (He also got his own personal plaid pattern.) The song is called "Heart's Cry" and it's by a band called Ooberfüse. They "sample" him! Listen here:

[Telegraph; pic via Getty; hat tip to Annitra]