1-800-DIAL-DMV used to connect you to New York State's Department of Motor Vehicles. Now it directs people to a lady who moans, "You're so big baby, wanna pull it out and watch it explode all over my beautiful backside?"

The new 1-800-DIAL-DMV presumably uses a different acronym. (The same phone number could also be alphabetized as 1-800-DICK-ENVY, 1-800-DIAL-EMU, or 1-800-EH-HALF-NUT.) Apparently the state gave up the number a year ago, and then it was reassigned. As is pretty much always the case with 800-numbers, it magically transformed into ladies who use the words "baby," "wet," and "spank" in a non-childcare context. Here is a sample of the new hotline's wares. Fair warning: Turn down your speakers if you're at work.

[CWAlbany via BullFightsOnAcid]