One Employee Starts Bedbug Panic at Wall Street Journal HeadquartersS

One heroic, honest—too honest Barron's staffer announced that he had bedbugs in his apartment building. Now the entire Wall Street Journal headquarters are on edge. Fearmongering company email, below.

We are currently taking proactive action to assure our offices remain clear of the bed bug problems that have afflicted other companies in New York City.

After a Barron's staffer on the fourth floor of 1211 [Avenue of the Americas] informed us of bed bugs inside his apartment building, we arranged to test the area around his desk. We found no bugs. Nor could we find any physical sign of bugs. A dog trained to recognize the scent of bed bugs, however, did signal concerns. So even though we can't find any specific evidence of any bugs, we will steam clean and treat the area to make sure no problem manifests itself. The process in the Barron's area of 1211 will take about 24 hours, after which normal operations will resume there.

We are acting out of an abundance of caution to forestall your worries and help reassure you that your workplace is safe. Should you still have concerns please address them to Mike Paulucci.

Staffers are already panicking. To the painfully honest employee: we hope you learned your lesson. Never be honest.