Desperate for a Coke Fix, Lindsay Lohan Runs Away from RehabS

The "coke" was coca-cola, the goal was a vending machine, and she failed. Christina Aguilera confirms splitting with her husband. Rachel Zoe is pregnant. Joan Collins ridicules ugly starlets. Wednesday gossip would sell its first child for a soda.

  • Desperate for a coke fix, Lindsay Lohan tried to escape rehab. But the "coke" was "coca-cola," and the "escape" was more of an "attempt sneak off to use a vending machine." Apparently LiLo and another patient tried to escape the Betty Ford Center for the nearby Eisenhower Medical Center, where the beverages are yummier. (Caffeine isn't allowed in the clinic.) But LiLo's "co-conspirator" got snagged on a fence (that happens outside of cartoons?) and they "were forced to give it up and flag down a volunteer, who was crossing the center's grounds on a golf cart." If only there were video; this would make a great viral marketing campaign. Update: LiLo's lawyer denies this. [Radar, vintage image of LiLo sneaking around with coke in 2009 via Pacific Coast News]

  • Christina Aguilera has confirmed yesterday's rumor that she has separated from scruffy music producer husband Jordan Bratman: "Although Jordan and I are separated, our commitment to our son Max remains as strong as ever." Page Six reports that Xtina's girls-only weekend with Nicole Richie and Samantha Ronson in Cabo San Lucas was the beginning of the end, but doesn't specify why. (If she's going gay for SamRo, I'll die and go to gossip heaven. More likely, she got drunk and talked about her feelings.) Since the break-up confirmation, Christina has been seen wandering the wilds of Los Angeles in sweatpants, tearfully hugging her friends. [People, P6, Us]

  • Emaciated stylist-turned-reality star Rachel Zoe is definitely pregnant, says someone who won't go on the record with his name. [Us]

  • Brad Pitt visited Angelina Jolie on the set of her Bosnian love story movie. She smiled, and a thousand songbirds burst into song. [Us]

  • Brett Favre penis picture recipient Jenn Sterger has been "deluged with offers" for personal appearances and other fameball-y business transactions, but she's laying low and is cancelling on previous engagements. Anti-fameball. [P6]

  • Joan Collins laments the lack of beauty in Hollywood: "There aren't that many good looking actresses around today. I mean, there's Angelina Jolie and there's… Angelina Jolie. Jennifer Aniston is cute, but I wouldn't call her beautiful. She's no Ava [Gardner] or Lana [Turner]." Damn, that old lady is catty. [DailyMail]

  • Eliot Spitzer can't last as long in bed as his TV show, says David Beckham's self-proclaimed call girl, who now claims she banged the Love Guv, too. He "was 45 minutes at most, and that would include undressing." That's still porn-star levels of longevity, though, isn't it? Depending how slowly they undressed, I guess. [P6]

  • Homophobic beauty queen Carrie Prejean might be in the new season of Survivor. She's serious about this nouveau Hasselbeck thing, isn't she? [X17]

  • Jessalyn Gilsig plays Mr. Schuester's ex-wife on Glee, and now she's someone's ex-wife in real life, too: She just signed divorce papers. [TMZ]