To promote MTV Europe's music awards, a swimsuit- and stiletto-clad Eva Longoria recorded a chest-thumping version of the kind of "rap" kindergarteners do: "Yo, I'm Eva Longoria! / This is the story-a! / Something-something-something Astoria!" Prepare to cringe.
[There was a video here]
She's probably cursing out her agent as we speak. At least her hair looks great?