Meet the Cartoon Character the Army is Using to Combat Wikileaks

Wikileaks has the Army totally freaked out, and it's stepping up its efforts to keep sensitive information out of unauthorized hands. This lame cartoon character it uses to train soldiers not to leak stuff doesn't seem up to the challenge.

The video above is captured from an online "training module" that the Army uses to teach soldiers about the evils of SAEDA—Subversion and Espionage Directed Against the Army (you can take the course yourself here). One instance of potential "subversion" to guard against could be, say, a handsome white-haired Australian encouraging you to hand over massive databases of classified intelligence reports so he can post them online. SAEDA has become an increasing concern of the Army's since the release in July of 90,000 Secret Army documents by Wikileaks, and since then the Pentagon has employed its secretive futurist arm DARPA to come up with an algorithm for detecting budding subversives and updated its SAEDA regulations to add the "unauthorized release or disclosure of classified or sensitive information" to the list of dangers soldiers should be on the lookout for.

But who needs DARPA when you've got a McGruff the Crime Dog-style cartoon seargent to talk to your soldiers like Third Graders about information security? The above training exercise—which is basically a glorified PowerPoint presentation combined with a reading comprehension quiz—features an unnamed animated "trainer" who periodically pops up to shout "hoo-a" and ask questions like "What does SAEDA stand for?" Julian Assange doesn't stand a chance.