Republican Finds Magical Bag of Uncounted Votes in ConnecticutS

If election day is Democracy's Christmas, then discovering a big bag of uncounted votes is like finding a sweet flatscreen HD television under your tree. Connecticut Republican gubernatorial candidate, Tom Foley, claims a bag of uncounted ballots just turned up!

The bag of votes was discovered in Bridgeport, CT, which was plagued by a bunch of near-slapstick-level voting snafus on Tuesday. Most egregiously, they ran out of official ballots and had to use photocopies instead. The bag of votes appears to be full of those photocopied ballots, so an elections official might want to check the surveillance footage of local Kinkos to make sure Foley wasn't up all night printing hundreds of pre-checked ballots and stuffing them into a sack.

Too bad this magic bag of votes won't change anything. Both Foley and his opponent, Democrat Dan Malloy, have claimed victory, but the secretary of state declared Malloy the winner by more than 3,000 votes. It's nice that Foley is so concerned about everyone's votes being counted, though. If we found a bag of uncounted votes we'd sell it on eBay.

[Image via Shutterstock]