Are you worried about global warming? Don't be! According to Illinois Rep. John Shimkus—candidate for chair of the House Energy and Commerce Committee—climate change isn't a big deal. How does he know? Because of the Bible!
Shimkus, a Republican who represents part of Springfield and some St. Louis suburbs, is seeking the chairmanship for the Energy and Commerce Committee. And good thing, too, because what's really missing in this whole terrible fake "debate" about climate change is sub-Sunday school Biblical literalism.
See, Shimkus' whole take on this "global warming" situation is informed by the part in the Bible when—after flooding the earth—God promises Noah he'll never again destroy the world. So, obviously, climate change won't do much harm to the planet. Because of God's promise. Do you follow? This is all in Genesis, people!
But that kind of scintillating logic isn't all Shimkus brings to the table—Progress Illinois illustrates his climate expertise:
During a discussion at a hearing about the Environmental Protection Agency's ruling that greenhouse gases threaten public health and the environment, Shimkus noted that carbon dioxide is a natural result of breathing and asked, "Does EPA propose we stop breathing?" (They do not.) At a dinner held by the Sangamon County Republicans in February, Shimkus suggested that the sight of farmers "ice-fishing on ponds in Southern Illinois" is the latest evidence that global warming is a "hoax." Oh, and let's not forget the time Shimkus expressed fear that curbing carbon emissions would "take away plant food." (Scientists disagree.)