New Maryland Republican Representative Andy Harris won his seat on a platform of resisting the expansion of "government-run or government-mandated insurance." He also spent Monday demanding to know why he had to wait 28 days for his own government-run insurance.

Because the House of Representatives is like a slightly less self-aware version of college, the government holds a series of orientation sessions where they play "Two Truths and a Lie" and learn how to put condoms on. Kidding! They learn important congress stuff like "How to Vote," and the nuts and bolts of things like their health care plans.

Which is where Andy Harris comes in. According to Politico's Glenn Thrush, who talked to an aide who was there, Harris, an anesthesiologist, was apparently pretty ticked that his (government-run) health-care plan wouldn't take effect until February 1, almost a full month after his January 3 swearing-in:

"He stood up and asked the two ladies who were answering questions why it had to take so long, what he would do without 28 days of health care," said a congressional staffer who saw the exchange. The benefits session, held behind closed doors, drew about 250 freshman members, staffers and family members to the Capitol Visitors Center auditorium late Monday morning,".

"Harris then asked if he could purchase insurance from the government to cover the gap," added the aide, who was struck by the similarity to Harris's request and the public option he denounced as a gateway to socialized medicine.

It's hard to know where to start with this one! But, well, how about: Gosh, Dr. Harris, if you're wondering what to do during that 28-day period where you don't have health care, you might turn to one of the 50 million Americans who aren't currently insured. I bet they'd have some tips for you!

Or, maybe, Dr. Harris, you could consider that most businesses require employees to wait something like 90 days to provide comprehensive coverage, and 28 days is a pretty sweet deal? Haha, of course you couldn't, since, as you said, "this is the only employer I've ever worked for where you don't get coverage the first day you are employed." You might consider that you're pretty lucky, if that's the case, since these days, if an employer offers health insurance, offering it from the first day is pretty rare!

(Not to mention, dude, if you are desperate, you can just pay for an extension on COBRA to get that month of coverage.)

Because, really, doc, right now, you sound like the world's biggest asshole. And not even because of the hilariously outsized sense of entitlement! (Well, okay, sort of that.) But because you spent your campaign saying things like "In Washington... I will fight to repeal health-care reform," and apparently you have no clue how health insurance works for most Americans.

[Politico; image via AP]