New Jersey pastor Cedric Miller ordered married congregants to give up Facebook because the "temptation is just too great." His inspiration: The plight of congregant Elliott Subervi, who says 2000 beautiful women friended him, then tormented him with sexy messages.

The New York Post's Joe Mollica reports that Elliott Subervi, a personal trainer, joined Facebook for "harmless social networking." Then, horror, "fitness models" and "bodybuilders" started friending him. Lustfully.

I would get several e-mails a week saying how gorgeous I was and here's my phone number. These girls didn't care that I was married, and my page said so. I didn't want to cheat on my wife, but these women were throwing themselves at me.

Oh, Elliott. Those weren't female suitors; that was porn. Nonetheless, the messages tormented our chaste hero, for they had awakened the carnal beast within. Oh, how he fought the urges!

They were coming on a little too strong. I could see infidelity being eventual.

His wife could see it, too. The pair sought counsel with Reverend Miller, who told Elliott to get off Facebook. (Here's a cached version of his old profile. He has a private one for family only, now.) Then, Rev. Miller told his congregants they should do the same, and ordered married church leaders to quit Facebook or step down.

And that is the story of how one horny middle-aged dude ruined Facebook for everyone at the Living Word Christian Fellowship church in Neptune, New Jersey. [NYP, LAT, Facebook profile of's "Jennifer Wilson" for illustrative purposes only]