The (Abridged) U.S. Government Guide to Drug Slang

Did you know the Office of National Drug Control Policy has a publicly-accessible database of "street terms" for drugs? It's like the feds' own Urban Dictionary. But with even less accountability and oversight! Here's an abridged version.

Drugs: Is that even what they're called anymore? Yes, it can be hard to keep up with drug "lingo," or slang, especially when you are high pretty much all the time. Luckily, the U.S. government has been doing it for us! The Office of National Drug Control Policy has compiled a 2,300-term database of words about drugs, intended for "police officers, parents, treatment providers and others who require a better understanding of drug culture." Which, oh my god, we totally require a better understanding of drug culture!

But which are the really key terms—the ones we should be looking for when we sign into our childrens' Facebook accounts in search of a new dealer? Vice came across the database and selected a few of their favorites. And here's our list of the most popular, widely-used and "coolest" drug terms out there. Drop a few of these at a house party, and who knows? You might actually get to "geez a bit of dee gee"! Or, be arrested.

The Abridged U.S. Government "Street Terms Database"

  • All-American drug Cocaine
  • Are you anywhere? Do you use marijuana?
  • Assassin of Youth Marijuana
  • Author Doctor who writes illegal prescriptions
  • Base crazies Searching on hands and knees for cocaine or crack
  • Big doodig Heroin
  • Blow your mind Get high on hallucinogens
  • Boo boo bama Marijuana
  • Chicken scratch Searching on hands and knees for crack or cocaine
  • Dinkie dow Marijuana
  • Dinosaurs Populations of heroin users in their forties and fifties
  • Dream gun Opium
  • Feenin Behavior associated with a person craving cocaine or other addictive substances when they are unavailable
  • Fly Mexican airlines To smoke marijuana
  • Foo foo stuff Heroin; cocaine
  • Four Loko Caffeinated malt liquor; also known as "blackout in a can"
  • Gangster pills Depressants
  • Geezin a bit of dee gee To inject a drug
  • Goblet of jam Marijuana
  • Good stuff High potency drug, especially marijuana
  • Goop Gamma hydroxybutyrate (GHB)
  • Graduate Completely stop using drugs; progress to stronger drugs
  • How do you like me now? Crack Cocaine
  • Hubba pigeon Crack users looking for rocks on the floor after a police raid
  • Hubba, I am back Crack Cocaine
  • Interplanetary mission Travel from one crackhouse to another to search for crack
  • Kate bush Marijuana
  • Kissing The exchange of plastic wrapped rocks (crack) by kissing or through mouth to mouth transfer
  • Merchandise Drugs
  • Mission Trip out of the crackhouse to obtain crack
  • Movie star drug Cocaine
  • Mow the grass To smoke marijuana
  • Nontoucher Crack user who doesn't want affection during or after smoking crack
  • Old navy Heroin
  • One plus one sales Selling cocaine and heroin together
  • Oyster stew Cocaine
  • Raspberry Female who trades sex for crack or money to buy crack
  • Sandwich Two layers of cocaine with a layer of heroin in the middle
  • Seconds Second inhalation of crack from a pipe
  • Sextasy Ecstasy used with Viagra
  • Sh*t Heroin
  • Speedballs-nose-style The practice of snorting cocaine
  • Strawberry LSD; female who trades sex for crack or money to buy crack
  • Thirst monsters Heavy crack smokers
  • Totally spent Hangover feeling that is an adverse effect of methylenedioxymethamphetamine (MDMA)
  • Toucher User of crack who wants affection before, during, or after smoking crack
  • Twin towers Heroin (after September 11)
  • Wigging Odd behavior resulting from the use of mind-altering drugs
  • Zoomer Individual who sells fake crack and then flees

[ONDCP via Vice; image via Shutterstock]