Disney Town Has Its First MurderS

You'll always remember your first. Celebration, FL, the creepy town built by Disney in the '90s, has long been a place of eerie, forced quaintness. Well, no longer. They've had their first-ever homicide, just in time for the holidays.

As the AP reports, a 58-year-old resident of the 11,000-person hamlet was murdered in his home over the Thanksgiving weekend, scarring the magic Disney (well, OK, Disney gave up control of the place some years ago) town irrevocably:

Residents of the town five miles south of Walt Disney World woke up Tuesday to the sight of yellow crime-scene tape wrapped around a condo near the Christmas-decorated downtown, where Bing Crosby croons from speakers hidden in the foliage. A 58-year-old neighbor who lived alone with his Chihuahua had been slain over the long Thanksgiving weekend, Osceola County sheriff's deputies said.

The community's famous friendliness is what brought investigators Matteo Giovanditto's body: Neighbors hadn't seen the victim for days, so they filed a missing person's report, then went into his condo a day later and found him.

A few years ago, a resident joked with a reporter that Celebration would feel like real town when a bike was stolen. Now, it has an unsolved killing on its hands.

So, murder: sad, bad, yes, all that. But Christmas music playing in the trees? SHRIEEEEEEK.

Basically this is going to make the best movie ever. In the end, of course, it'll be the squeakiest and cleanest person in the town who did it, because they were trying to preserve or save something they thought was slipping away, some pure ideal, but of course in the act of trying to save it, they ruined it forever. Tragic, but beautiful.

[via unfriended]