Ten Days After Turning 18, Miley Cyrus Has a Naked Picture Scandal

An unidentifiable, maybe-Miley naked picture circulates the internet. Eva and Tony reunite for lunch. Jessica Simpson proves she's not pregnant by doing shots. Jon Gosselin gets a job. Thursday gossip is old for its age.

  • And on the tenth day of being "of age," Miley Cyrus had a naked picture scandal. (She really is the human incarnation of our starlet-building, -consuming, and -abusing culture. But that's a blog post for another day.) Miley faced quasi-nude picture scandals in her underage years, too, but unlike every other time, this time there is areola and a naked vagina hidden only by one of those sexy poses where the lady hikes up her knee as though trying really hard not to pee. But is it really Miley? The naked lass has long hair and wears only a flannel shirt, which hangs open as she poses with her iPhone. Some people think it's someone else. (Like someone who impersonates a famous Disney star to create incriminating tabloid-ready material? Why does that sound so familiar?) Other people think it's real, and have gone to great lengths to prove it. Oh, and Miley's not posing for Playboy. [GossipCop, image via Getty]

  • A newly single Christina Aguilera has announced it to the world: She is in love! And it's the male romantic lead a set assistant from her new movie Burlesque. Update: Whoops! The truth is more romantic than reality, mostly because there's no PR angle. [Radar]

  • Everyone thought Jessica Simpson was pregnant, but then she did tequila shots and drained a couple margaritas at a bar. Public drunkenness is the best way to disprove a pregnancy rumor. [P6]

  • Jon Gosselin got a real job. Not a new TV show, not a pair "appearance," not something new pimping his kids. But an actual job, with computers, like the one he had before he was famous for his sextuple spooge. [E!]

  • Meanwhile, L'Affaire Britney's Black Eye continues: Radar released a second audio recording of "Britney Spears" discussing her supposedly abusive agent-turned-boyfriend Jason Trawick. In it, "Britney" says she didn't file a police report because she didn't want tabloid stories about her. Given that Team Britney maintains that all of the recordings are fake, created specifically for tabloid stories, we might be approaching infinite jest. [Radar]

  • Eva Longoria and Tony Parker reunited for the first time since announcing their divorce, probably to trade tips for covering up regrettable couples tattoos. [TMZ]

  • Kathleen Parker, of CNN stinkbomb Parker Spitzer, brings her blind 5-lb. poodle to work everyday. "The dog sits still like a stuffed animal." Can't decide if that's cute or annoying. I have a soft spot for blind dogs. [P6]

  • In other depressing and invasive nudity news, Jennifer Lopez's legal battle to block her ex-husband's release of embarrassing videos now includes the phrases "exposing her genital area in public" and "deviant behavior." (Ex-husband's lawyer's characterization. Obviously.) Apparently one video shows J.Lo riding a scooter around Cuba "with her privates in as plain view as Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan have in the past." So Ojai Noa created a paparazzi-style upskirt video of own wife while on vacation with her? No wonder J.Lo wants her lawyers to nail his ass to the wall. [NationalEnquirer]

  • Nicole Richie settled with a photographer she accused of stalking her child. He agreed to stay away from the Richie-Maddens for five years. [TMZ]

  • Hey, remember that America's Next Top Model contestant with the superhumanly tiny, corseted waist? She won! [Us]

  • Heidi Montag is learning martial arts because she can no longer afford bodyguards. May I suggest a master class with Mick Foley. [Radar]