U.K. Doesn't Want Silly Old Scientists to Advise on Drug Policy

The British government is quietly trying to end a legal requirement that its Advisory Council for the Misuse of Drugs contain at least six scientists and a drug industry expert. Because who cares what scientists have to say about drugs?

If you ask me, it's about time someone stood up to these so-called "scientists," with their "scientific method" and "rigorous empiricism" and "facts"! So thank God for the U.K., which won't be asking those know-it-alls what their opinions are on drugs or drug policy anymore.

You see, the government's Advisory Council for the Misuse of Drugs is required by law to include "a doctor, a dentist, a vet, a pharmacist, a drugs industry expert and a scientist from another branch of chemistry." But the British government, which must be so sick of hearing those busybodies natter on about the big bang, or whatever boring things scientists talk about, is trying to end that requirement.

(The decision is coming in the wake of last year's firing of Professor David Nutt, the council chairman, who opened his big scientist mouth and objected when the Labour government tried to upgrade pot to the more dangerous "Class B" category. What a jerk! Just go with the flow, scientist-guy.)

And, of course, a bunch of people are protesting. But we support the government, because, really: What do scientists know about drugs? They are basically the biggest nerds in the world! They have probably never even seen a drugs! Get them off this council! In fact, get them the hell out of Great Britain! Then, you can decide which drugs are dangerous by vote.

[BBC; image via Shutterstock]