House Republicans have declared victory in the historic battle for Electronic Freedom! They've changed the rules to allow members to use electronic devices in the House chamber — as long as it doesn't "impair decorum," which it probably will.
This is great news for members of the House. Now, instead of reading paper bills or talking, they can sit in their fine leather thrones and play Angry Birds. (You've heard about the Angry Birds, yes? They're everywhere!) Or something else! Really, whatever you're into, you can now look at it on your Android iPhone iPad Blackberry from the House floor.
Since one member or another will inevitably be caught "impairing decorum" by jacking off to online porn, perhaps as soon as the mid-winter budget debate, these privileges won't last forever. But one member of Congress, Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen of Florida, was the first to take advantage of these new rules during today's swearing-in of the new Congress. (Even though the rules haven't been finalized yet. Whoops! Fire her.)
[Top: Photo-illustration of new House Speaker John Boehner with a flesh-colored Blackberry in hand. His flesh, at least.]