TONIGHT: We've got the season premiere of Jersey Shore and Wipeout, plus new episodes of The Big Bang Theory, $#*! My Dad Says, Million Dollar Money Drop, CSI, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, and more!

8:00 PM

Million Dollar Money Drop Money. Drops. Pollack. (FOX)
The Big Bang Theory Leonard has a great idea for a smartphone app, and it causes friction with Sheldon. (CBS)
Wipeout The fourth-season premiere is a winter version of the extreme obstacle course, featuring Spinning Ski Lift, Snowplow Sweeper and Big Balls with a new twist, the Snow-tivator. (ABC)

8:30 PM

$#*! My Dad Says Ed is up in arms when a piece of prized baseball memorabilia that he wants is sold to someone else. Meanwhile, Vince and Bonnie find their new living situation getting in the way of their attempts to have a baby. (CBS)

9:00 PM

CSI A call girl is strangled to death and her body is found in a Dumpster. A photo of the crime scene appeared on the Internet before the victim was discovered, but it was initially believed by the CSIs to be fake. Carrot Top appears as himself. (CBS)
Grey's Anatomy A mass shooting at a nearby college reopens some not-so-old wounds at the hospital. Meanwhile, Arizona returns to a welcome that's less than warm. (ABC)
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Camille sets out to mend her seriously shattered relationship with Kyle by inviting Kyle to a potentially cringe-worthy tennis-and-swimming get-together. Also, Kyle hosts a birthday party for Mauricio, but Taylor's marital issues rise to the surface. (Bravo)

10:00 PM

Jersey Shore The roommates return to Seaside Heights in the season opener, and Snooki's friend Deena fills the spot left open by twice ousted Angelina. Later, the girls' feud from Miami spills over into the first night. (MTV)
Private Practice Addison's mother (JoBeth Williams) demands that Addison do all she can to save her dying partner (Ann Cusack)—-even if it means collaborating with Dr. Rodriguez (Cristián de la Fuente). Meanwhile, Charlotte and Cooper try to be intimate again; a patient's wife and mistress disagree on his treatment, complicating life for Pete and Amelia; and Violet considers publishing a personally revealing book that she has written. (ABC)
The Mentalist The murder of a woman tied to a pro fighter has the team exploring the mixed-martial arts world. Meanwhile, LaRoche continues to focus his investigation on Jane. (CBS)

Who's on the Late Night Couches Tonight?

The Daily Show: Patton Oswalt (Comedy Central)
The Colbert Report: Dr. Ronald DePinho (Comedy Central)
Conan: Gwyneth Paltrow, T.J. Miller, Jimmy Eat World (TBS, Repeat)
Jimmy Kimmel Live!: Amy Adams, Chris Colfer, Young the Giant (ABC)
Lopez Tonight:Jamie Foxx, Jayma Mays, Freddy Sanchez, Orianthi (TBS, Repeat)
Chelsea Lately: Tim McGraw, Ben Gleib, Heather McDonald, Dan Levy (E!)
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Hilary Swank, Jesse Eisenberg, Los Lobos (NBC)
Late Night with Jimmy Fallon: Jim Carrey, Dr. Mehmet Oz, Iron & Wine (NBC)
Late Show with David Letterman: Seth Rogen, Beau Garrett, the Walkmen (CBS)
Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Gary Sinise, Alex Kingston (CBS)