The Time Oprah Winfrey Ate 30 Lbs. of Macaroni and CheeseS

Oprah consoled depression with the biggest mac 'n' cheese binge in history. Kelsey Grammer likes to wear women's panties. Johnny Weir realized he was gay while watching Pretty Woman. Keira Knightley is single. Thursday gossip eats its emotions.

  • When Beloved bombed at the box office, Oprah Winfrey was so bummed out, she went into a "massive, depressive macaroni and cheese-eating tailspin." As in, she called her personal chef, ordered some mac, and proceeding to eat "about 30 lbs. worth. I'm not kidding." I mean, if I had a team of fancy chefs at my beck and call 24 hours a day, I'd—well—I probably wouldn't eat that much, but a larger-than-usual serving, sure. [Us, image via Getty]

  • Keira Knightleybroke up with actor boyfriend Rupert Friend, whom she met on the set of 2005's Pride and Prejudice. Now she and Scarlett Johansson will face off for the title of "most eligible bachelorette in Hollywood." My money's on ScarJo, but Keira's scrappy. [People]

  • Snake-like Real Housewife Camille Grammer insinuated that soon-to-be ex-husband Kelsey Grammer is a cross-dressing quasi-gay on Howard Stern's radio show. "I couldn't understand why he couldn't physically be with me," Camille murmured throatily. She then steered the conversation to crossdressing, giggling and nodding while Howard asks if they would "act like lesbians" in bed, and how Kelsey fit into Camille's tiny panties. "He has a little waist." Kelsey refused to comment. [Howard Stern Show, TMZ, Us via james_from_cambridge]
  • Michelle 'Bombshell' McGee, the painted lady who banged Sandra Bullock's husband, was apparently in Charlie Sheen's hotel room during last weekend's Las Vegas bender. She won't be partying with him again, though, because he's a "trainwreck." When a stripper named Bombshell calls you a "trainwreck," it's over. [TMZ]

  • Johnny Weir knew he was gay at the age of six, when he watched Pretty Woman and seeing Julia Roberts in thigh-high boots inspired feelings of aspiration instead of horniness. [Howard Stern Show via Autostraddle]

  • Holly Madison is not mad that Hugh Hefner is marrying some other bimbo, she's just worried: "I feel like he's making a hasty decision. I'm no sure Crystal is the best thing for him… She's very young, probably too young to settle down… I don't think it would be a bad idea for him to get to know her a little better." And, "Crystal had better not do him wrong or else I'll kick her butt." And, "I'm not jealous he'd marry someone else… Basically I think he could do better than Crystal." Just looking out for you, Hef. [L&S]

  • The Time Oprah Winfrey Ate 30 Lbs. of Macaroni and CheeseNicki Minaj did a photoshoot for V that is, to quote Refinery 29, "part Day of the Dead, part Juggalette." The interview is the usual magnanimous glossy nothing, but since Nicki says this photoshoot is her "most badass shoot to date," I feel compelled to acknowledge it. [V, Refinery29]

  • Apparently Ryan Seacrest is winding up to propose to PR-friendly dancer/singer/actress girlfriend Julianne Hough, and already has "the Rolls Royce of engagement rings." [Radar]

  • A cancer-free Michael Douglas has gone back to work. He is hard at work researching his first next role: Liberace. [People]

  • Piers Morgan on his secret feud with Madonna: "Something has happened with Madonna, a few things have gone down between Madonna and I. There's a few things have happened. She knows." If she even knows who Piers Morgan is, that is. [AH]

  • Precociously cool celebrity progeny Willow Smith and Jaden Smith have been nominated for NAACP Image Awards. This is definitely what W.E.B. DuBois and Ida B. Wells had in mind when they founded that organization. Mostly I'm just excited to use all those bold names in one item. [People]