You heard it last night: house music throbbing through your walls, wild shrieks coming from the street, the sound of clothing being shed. "It's the teenagers," you thought to yourself.

"They've seen the third episode of SKINS and now they're insatiable."

The most recent episode of Destroying Our Nation's Youth is focused on Chris, a latchkey kid who takes erection pills for fun, then walks around with his boner taped to his stomach for the entire day. Anyway, Chris awakens to find his mother gone (what kind of mom could leave a son like that?) and an envelope containing one thousand dollars left on the table. The money is meant to get him through the next few days, but, with the encouragement of Tony and all of the other charmless idiots that he hangs out with, he decides to use it to throw a party instead.

The party is a rager, I guess? A rager is when a bunch of kids pretend to take drugs and bump into each other to terrible music, right? If so, it's definitely a rager. At one point, the pretty lady teacher who Chris has been flirting with shows up and he convinces her to dance. Unfortunately, the boner that Chris has been keeping taped to his stomach (yep, that's still there) becomes unstuck and the teacher freaks and leaves. It's a little strange that she would get on her moral high horse considering that she's the full-grown adult slow dancing with a seventeen year-old at a high school house party, but get on it she does and poor Chris is left feeling dejected.

Chris wakes up the next morning to find all of his money blown and his house torn apart. His mom is still nowhere to be found so he resorts to selling some household electronics for cash. This leads to the dispensing of some very disturbing advice:

[There was a video here]

Forget drugs and sex. Are teenagers rubbing pee on their faces to get rid of acne? Oy! Kids today.

Unable to get any cash, things get progressively worse for Chris and ultimately he finds himself homeless. Accompanied by Daisy, he tracks down his dad to ask for help. His dad, however, wants nothing to do with him and sends him packing. This is when Chris reveals to Daisy that he had an older brother who is now dead. He asks her not to tell anyone for reasons that are totally unclear and she agrees because why not.

Unfortunately, the reveal about Chris' brother does nothing to solve his homelessness, so he does what any well-balanced young man would do, which is to say that he hides in the trunk of Sexy Lady Teacher's car. When she finds him, she responds with equal sanity by inviting him to stay in her guest room. It's right to assume that this can only lead to an appropriate teacher/student relationship with no moral ambiguity whatsoever.