What Can Your State Cut From Its Budget?

Governors across America are finally acknowledging that deep, painful budget cuts are unavoidable. But there's no one-size-fits-all prescription for state budget cuts. That's so stupid! For patriotism, we've composed this highly specific listicle noting exactly what each state in the union can cut back on. Is your state included? (Yes.)

  • Alaska: Palin trinketeering
  • Alabama: Official Crimson Tide-hued sports coats
  • Arkansas: Nut clusters
  • Arizona: Tumbleweed photographers
  • California: Schwarzenegger marijuana granola
  • Colorado: Snow placement
  • Connecticut: Lieberman-mentioning
  • Delaware: Corporate welfare for the credit card industry, seriously
  • Florida: Police Facebook-photo-of-baby-smoking-bong enforcement divisions
  • Georgia: Dip cups
  • Hawaii: Excess lei-giving
  • Idaho: Potatomongering
  • Iowa: Cornhole marketing
  • Illinois: Hoop dreams
  • Indiana: Ditto
  • Kansas: Oz rescue machinery
  • Kentucky: Blue grasspaint
  • Louisiana: Crawdad wet wipes
  • Maine: Bear therapy
  • Maryland: Heroin
  • Massachusetts: Accent enhancement training
  • Michigan: Detroit
  • Minnesota: Heat
  • Mississippi: School
  • Missouri: Show-mes
  • Montana: Tourist-friendly animatronic elk placement
  • Nebraska: Open space
  • Nevada: Whores (public sector only).
  • New Hampshire: Craggy visage-ry
  • New Jersey: That attitude
  • New Mexico: Crappy turquoise jewelry
  • New York: Buffalo support payments
  • North Carolina: Duke
  • North Dakota: Fargo reminiscence
  • Ohio: Forced emigration of residents to cooler states
  • Oklahoma: Dust, bowls, dusty bowls
  • Oregon: Log-hating, expensive wooden furniture
  • Pennsylvania: Phanatacism
  • Rhode Island: Smallness preservatives
  • South Carolina: Partial tires on the side of a sad highway to nowhere
  • South Dakota: Dakotan differentiation programs
  • Tennessee: Hickery
  • Texas: Barbecue grandiosity
  • Utah: Mormon delusions
  • Vermont: Enforced preciousness
  • Virginia: Confederacy whitewashing, the official state pastime
  • Washington: Corner-ness
  • Wisconsin: Ice fishing disaster response
  • West Virginia: Ineptitude
  • Wyoming: Cheney spawning

[Shout out to Max Read for having this idea first. Photo: Shutterstock]