This morning I made fun of Jennifer Aniston because, like Skee-Ball and making brownies from a box, it is fun and easy. Someone took umbrage with my calling her unlovable and rushed to her defense. Quelle horreur!
Hi. My name is Clam, and I actually like Jennifer Aniston. The first step in recovery is admitting I have a problem. Well screw that. She's hot. But she needs to call me before she decides on the next movie role. Seriously, Jennifer. Call me. You can't keep doing these. Also, marry me.
Quick, Jennifer, this is your last shot at love. You better take it!
[Image via Getty]