For about an hour last night, starting at 10pm, Charlie Sheen rambled live on UStream in a webshow called "Sheen's Korner." The most interesting thing about this embarrassing piece of crap was that, thanks to UStream's viewer display count, you could see people getting sick of Sheen in real time: At its peak, more than 100,000 people followed along as Sheen said whatever was on his mind and his buddies laughed at his unfunny jokes sycophantically. But as the broadcast ground on it shed thousands of users by the minute.
Because it was so boring! The Hollywood Reporter called it "cable access at its worse." At one point, Sheen openly admitted: "Now what? We're out of material." And Twitter hated on it too: "Thanks to Charlie Sheen for showing the importance of interviewers, producers and editors in painful real time tonight," said @cdhook.
Barring some insane new development, "Sheen's Korner" marks the beginning of the end of our national obsession with Sheen's breakdown. Its momentum, Internet-driven as it is, requires a constant churn of new catchphrases and meme-fodder. In an entire hour of "Sheen's Korner," not one new thing came out of Sheen. The most notable moment was when Sheen unveiled a "WINNING" tattoo, and probably the funniest thing he said was about the old funny things he's said: "There's been a lot of wordsmithing that has fallen gracefully from this beautiful hole. It has caught on like an absolute global wildfire."
As of Sunday morning, "Charlie Sheen's Beautiful Hole" is not a Twitter trending topic. Thankfully.
Update: Sheen has tweeted a mea culpa, of sorts, for his horrendous webcast:
last night was treasonous to the movement.
my bad. a video solution coming soon.