Aubrey O'Day's new series on Oxygen includes dog O face, frenemy undermining and previews of her viewing her tattooed father's balls. Everyone may be horrible and no one is safe in this expensively housed docu-world.

So begins All About Aubrey, whose passers-by-modified ads have had me laughing on the subway for weeks. Our heroine struggles with weight and feelings of inadequacy as she prepares for an album launch. She's still reeling after career missteps including having been dissed by Diddy. Living with a magazine editor, now jobless, who thinks she's fat. Working with a choreographer/guru who thinks she's fat. And training with a genius voice coach, who accepts her 'butter" because he's "black."

Maybe I wouldn't feel so weird about the dog masturbation scene if I'd taken 4H? Or if the dogs weren't gussied up like Marie Antoinette's cows.

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Aubrey's dance mentor asks her to wash off her makeup and strip down in order to become her authentic self, and she sobs then transforms into a Flashdance sexpot. I wish I were that fat.

And I think she should never put on eyeliner again, ever.

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During the premiere's commercial breaks and after the show your new favorite band Aubrey and The Frenemies chatted and responded to tweeted and Facebooked questions on Oxygen Live: Obsessed via UStream on Oxygen's website. There Aubrey showed herself to be a bit of a twit when she blithely states her friend's BF doesn't have any swagger and crocodiles it up when she finds out she's trending. I want her to grow and change, but it seems to me that she may still have a way to go. Putting down the gem-encrusted sorority letter-emblazoned cellphone would be a start.

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Then there's dear old Dad.

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All About Aubrey airs on Oxygen Mondays at 10PM