Charlie Sheen: 'It Wasn't Even My Machete'

Police raided Charlie Sheen's house last night looking for weapons after he was seen brandishing a machete from his balcony earlier in the week. He claims it wasn't his and it belongs to the "guy [he] was having a meeting with." Sorry, Charlie, that excuse didn't work when my mom found my bong when I was in high school and it's not going to work now.

[Image via Bauer-Griffin]