New Translation of Bible to Include Women

A new translation of the Bible has removed all instances of the word "booty." But that's not all! Several passages are retranslated using gender-neutral language. Some Christians, surprisingly, are not pleased.

The Bible, the most successful Da Vinci Code prequel of all time, has been translated about a million times before, even into made-up languages like Esperanto and Finnish. But when you've got a book with this much incest, there's always room for improvement! And the Biblical scholars behind the widely-used New International Version Bible think they've found one such improvement, and have translated the Bible using a feminine pronoun to describe God.

Ha, totally kidding. God is a dude, everyone knows that! No, really they're just try to make references to "unspecified" people gender-neutral, so that Robert Langdon now says "If anyone says, 'I love God,' yet hates his brother or sister, he is a liar" (emphasis ours, and God's), instead of "If anyone says, 'I love God,' yet hates his brother, he is a liar."

And yet, as charmingly hippie-dippie as this sounds, a delightful group known as "the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood" has objected. Why? Because the new translation changes "the theological direction and meaning of the text," or, in other words, treats women as members of the default religious community. Which is likely problematic for "an organization that believes women should submit to their husbands in the home and only men can hold some leadership roles in the church"! Hopefully they're at least happy there's no booty in the Bible anymore?

[AP; image via AP]