Georgia father Eugene Ashley pleaded guilty this week to tattooing his three-year-old son with the initials "DB"—short for "Daddy's Boy." Really, dude? "DB"? You couldn't have come up with something better than that?
Now, look, we are not exactly Dr. Spock when it comes to parenting advice, but we know this much: If you are going to tattoo your three-year-old, at the very least give him something he actually wants tattooed on his body, like Thomas the Tank Engine, or a juice box. And if you really need to be the kind of domineering parent who chooses your three-year-old's tattoo, make it cool! At the very least include a snake or a knife or something.
But, no, this poor kid is stuck with "DB" for the rest of his life. He's not the only one: Ashley is the third Georgia parent (that we know of) to tattoo his offspring; last January, a couple used a guitar string as a needle to tattoo six of their children with small crosses. What is wrong with parents these days? How hard would it be to do, like, a panther fighting an eagle??