There's a crisis brewing in California's local, organic, grass-fed, humanely slaughtered meat industry, man. Nice butchers are in short supply, forcing farmers and consumers to (gasp!) forgo their oath to the locavore movement and get their meat from hundreds of miles away.

And it's not as simple as enticing a few mustachioed guys in tight jeans and Wayfarers to pick up a meat cleaver, either. Stupid regulations in California make it so hard to cut some beef brah! Even butchers who promise to play nice with the animals can't catch a break. The Times spoke with a "niche meat" researcher at Iowa State University, who offered this blunt assessment of the local meat scene in California: "Basically, if I were to build a slaughterhouse, the last place I would build it is California." Harsh, brah.

You'd think that hippie California would be supportive of the trendy "niche meat" industry, but no. Once again you lose, West Coast.

[Image via Getty]