We hasten this morning to bring you the very latest on the Penn Frat Party Camel Abuse Controversy. What's that? You haven't been following the uproar at the Ivy League that erupted after the Zeta Psi fraternity went to a petting zoo and rented a camel for its "Spring Fling" party? And how some people objected to the way that the camel was surrounded by drunken Greeks and petted to within an inch of its life?
Well. You'll be happy to know that the controversy has been resolved. The school has cleared the fraternity of any wrongdoing. Still, George Leslie, the Penn student who snapped the camel photos in the first place, told the campus paper this week that the scene at the party was far from innocent:
According to Leslie, Zeta Psi "was packed full of people, all around the camel" and "girls were groping it and they were drunk."
Leslie added that a sheep, a rabbit and a wallaby in a cage were also present, and looked "terrified" from the loud music.
Dude, that camel was totally into it. Don't try to change your story now, slut camel.