See, the Feds' online poker crackdown was all part of the U.S.' master plan to kill Osama. "According to rumors circulating in the poker community," is how the post on the poker site Onlinepoker.net begins. So you know it's true!
We'll let Onlinepoker.net take you down the rabbit hole and show you just how deep it goes:
As the story/conspiracy theory goes, a few years back the CIA captured senior al-Qaeda operatives Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, who then disclosed the name of Bin Laden's closest aide after a ‘session' with top Romanian interrogator known only as ‘Radu'
In addition, the CIA apparently discovered Bin Laden's most trusted aide was also a keen online poker player, with both pieces of information then being confirmed after the capture of Khalid's replacement, Faraj al-Libi.
In August 2010, the CIA then learnt that Bin Laden was living within a mansion compound in Pakistan, although they did not know which one or where it was located.
However, on April 15, 2011 the ‘Big Three' poker sites had their domain names seized by US authorities and allegedly a deal was struck whereby the CIA received information on all online poker transactions in Pakistan and Afghanistan in exchange for the return of their domains and the unfreezing of bank accounts to facilitate the return of players' deposits.
Finally, within three days the US military were then quickly able to trace the location of Bin Laden's poker playing aide culminating in the May 1st Chinook helicopters assault on Bin Laden's compound and subsequent assassination at the hands of Navy SEAL ‘Team Six.
BOOM. Mind. blown. Who knew online poker was such an integral part of the Islamist extremist world? Let's stake out World of Warcraft, next.