Among the classified State Department cables released by Wikileaks—cables so sensitive that, even now, unauthorized federal employees are barred from reading them online—is a report of tense meeting between our ambassador to Norway and Santa Claus.
That's right. In 2009, U.S. Ambassador to Norway Bruce Oreck crafted a 632-word cable to his bosses in Washington, D.C., recounting a visit to "Santa's Village on Wednesday, December 16 to meet with Preeminent Ambassador to the World, His Excellency Saint Nicholas, aka Kris Kringle, aka Santa Claus." On the agenda? "Zero-emissions international travel, his continued unauthorized incursions into U.S. airspace, the high north issue and...insight into who has been naughty and who has been nice in 2009 — also known as 'The List.'" Your tax dollars at work. The cable—which is itself unclassified—was released by Wikileaks last month.
Now that Julian Assange has "recklessly and dangerously" exposed our foreign policy secrets—including the appearance of a drunken Rudolph at the meeting—Santa might not come back anymore. Wait til the grand jury gets ahold of this.
Interestingly, the Norway cable reveals Wikileaks' 2010 Christmas card—which read, "Dear kids: Santa is Mum & Dad. Love, WikiLeaks"—to have been part of a disinformation campaign, perhaps designed to throw hostile intelligence agencies off the trail.
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