Things to Do With Dead Loved Ones: Donate Them to Goodwill

For two months, the Goodwill store in Fenton, Michigan has been holding onto an urn—delivered to the store in a cardboard Palmolive box labeled "Grandma's urn"—because staffers assumed somebody would return and reclaim it. But nobody ever did.

Now the urn's with the Michigan State Police—who would like to find its owner, as they really have no practical use for an urn, or the remains of the dead person contained within. They'll hold onto the urn for six months ...and then? They don't go into detail about what comes next, but perhaps they can try to donate the urn to Goodwill.

If you would like to put your Scooby Doo instincts to the test and help solve this mystery—or if you think the urn might be yours, but aren't totally sure—here are some identifying features:

  • It's ten inches tall
  • It's cream-colored and not the most appealing urn ever made (this is more our style
  • It has "no serial numbers" or other identifying marks, says ABC
  • Inside the Palmolive box was a copy of The Oakland Press newspaper from August 12, 2004
  • The ashes, which have been tested, were formerly a living, breathing resident of the Fenton area

In writing this report we did some research into urn-related mysteries and learned that sometimes thieves steal urns out of cars and houses. Others deposit urns in the bushes of strangers. So this might not be the strangest urn-related story ever, all things considered.

[WJRT]