A Chicago landlord called the cops on Sunday after investigating a leak and stumbling upon one of his tenants, covered in blood. But he shouldn't have worried! The guy was just performing a little D.I.Y. surgery on his dog. In the nude.

Yes, Stewart Gibbs, 44, had a few drinks and decided, for some reason, that it was time to remove the cyst under his Doberman's ear, with a butcher knife. He then ran a bath to clean up—leading his downstairs neighbors to complain about a leak. Why he was naked is unclear, but some people just surgerize better without clothes on.

Gibbs has been charged with animal cruelty. The dog is fine, and our would-be vet has surrendered custody of it.

[Chicago Tribune]