Last week we breathlessly reported on America's Whitest Colleges, which we deduced from a list of schools that had signed deals to have Brooks Brothers produce incredibly goofy clothing with their college logos. The single most shocking school that did not appear on that list: Yale. UNTIL NOW.
The Yale Daily News is currently Windexing a nearby glass case in which to place its upcoming Pulitzer, to be awarded for this investigative story revealing that Yale—not the hated Harvard "Orangmen"—is actually the Dorko King Ivy League Lily White Nerd School Extraordinaire.
Brooks Brothers would not confirm that Yale's winning record in The Game had anything to do with the switch.
Hahahahahah and ZING goes the dynamite, for that last line! We contacted Harvard's media relations department and—after getting four (4) separate "out of office" messages from their alleged "communications" staff—finally tracked down spokesman John Longbrake, who informed us that "Harvard was never part of the licensing agreement. It was originally misreported we were."
Amazing. And we'd gone to all the trouble of naming Harvard our #1 most unbearably white school, when they didn't even qualify for a single branded Brooks Brothers polo shirt! We hereby award Yale that coveted #1 spot in Harvard's stead. Do some sort of celebratory dance for us, Yalies. Do it now.