Hey U.S. Marines! Apparently you need dates to the Marine Corps Ball this November, since you're asking celebrities like Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake on YouTube. But what about all you Marines who don't have the guts to invite a celebrity in a lighthearted video, but still want to go with a random stranger? You're in luck!

I will go to the Marine Corps Ball with anyone, from any unit anywhere in the U.S. Gawker has graciously agreed to pay my way. All you need to do is invite me. So, what do you say, U.S. Marines? I'm a really good dancer. Hit up adrian@gawker.com for the best night of your life.