Given that legendary country and western singer Dolly Parton's a vocal supporter of gay marriage, you might think that gays who visit her theme park in Tennessee would be welcomed with open arms. Not so, as one lesbian couple recently experienced.
Olivier Odom and Jennifer Tipton say that on July 9, they were turned away from Dollywood Splash Country after a gatekeeper read Odom's t-shirt, which stated "marriage is so gay," and told the couple that displaying such a message wasn't permissible inside the "family" park. What if Odom's public declaration of support for equal rights offended all the happy hetero families splashing around inside? What if the families read her shirt and became gay as a result? These are serious concerns!
A friend's young daughters were with Odom and Tipton, so Odom turned her shirt inside out to get past the gatekeeper and not spoil the kids' day. No word on whether she wore the shirt while splishing and splashing about the park—which raises the possibility that some of the garment's inherent gayness dripped into the pool and contaminated its waters with homosexuality. (If you visited Dollywood on July 9 and have since become gay, now you know why.) At any rate, she and Tipton have since filed a complaint with the park in order to pressure management into making the house rules more LGBTQ-friendly and inclusive.
A Dollywood spokesman says the couple's complaint has led park managers to discuss the current dress code, and might lead to some policy changes. One hopes that any new guidelines will not only prevent such incidents from occurring in the future, but also require visitors to wear more sequins and fringes in keeping with the fashion choices of its sparkly namesake.