Bad news, people who go to the store with the express purpose of purchasing Miller Lite™ brand beer: Ad Age reports that Miller Lite is growing steadily less popular. And during the "all-important summer beer-selling season"!
The fact that there is allegedly a "season" for selling beer is shocking, yes, but it's not what we're getting at here. Miller Lite sales fell nearly 7% in 2009, and 4% in 2010, and they're already down another 3% in the second quarter of this year, despite the wilting summer sun's ability to convince humans to drink even the most undesirable alcoholic swill, provided it's been iced down recently. The sad Miller Lite parent company actually tried to blame rainy weather for the decline, which, come on guys.
Credit Suisse's Carlos Laboy suggested the brewer was placing too much blame on the economy and weather, noting that its other brands fared better, such as Coors Light, which was up slightly in the quarter, and Blue Moon, which continued its double-digit growth. "The only unemployed consumers who keep getting rained on are the Miller Lite consumers," Mr. Laboy said sarcastically.
That dude works at Credit Suisse and knows that Miller Lite tastes like piss. And only unemployed drunks drink it, while crying in the rain. Maybe that's the problem.