After he plowed his Jeep into a condo's garage by mistakenly flooring it in reverse, Gordon Flavia, a 57-year-old man from Longview, Washington, found that he'd driven clear into a makeshift bathroom containing a portable toilet. He then "doused himself with a bucket of liquid human waste" and hid inside the Porta Potty. Police found him there, soaking wet.
"We didn't know exactly what it was ... but it smelled bad," Police Sgt. Doug Kazensky said.
Flavia told officers he'd splashed himself with the contents of a bucket outside a portable toilet "because he thought the dogs were coming, and he was trying to throw off the scent," Kazensky said.
Added Longview police Sgt. Ed Jones:
"It looks like alcohol was involved."