The Less Sexism, the More Everyone Gets Laid

Bros, I know you've been frustrated about the ladies not giving you any action. Ladies, I know you've been frustrated about dudes being pigs. Let's just kill two birds with one stone, sexually, yes?

New academic research confirms something that is intuitively grasped by the people who have the best sex lives in the world, yet which seems to constantly elude the frustrated, angry, powermongering masses of this crazy world (men): gender equality leads to more sex. Specifically, more equal societies tend to have "more casual sex, more sex partners per capita, younger ages for first sex and greater tolerance/approval of premarital sex." Because once you let the ladies have jobs and whatnot, they don't need to keep holding out on you, fellas!

"If women don't have many opportunities to make money on their own, they need the value of sex to be as high as possible," Baumeister says. "When women don't have other opportunities, sex is the main thing she has to offer."

So you tell women they can't have education and jobs and cars and all that and then you're like "Hey, wanna make out," and they're like "Sure, once you marry me and give me a house and goats and a guaranteed stable lifestyle because what else am I supposed to do?" And he's like "Uhh maybe just a kiss..." and she's like "You should have thought of that before you curtailed my opportunities, fool," and he's like "Damn."

Free love= Science. Get with it!

[USA Today. Photo: Shutterstock]